Friday, December 25, 2009

For Unto Us Is Born This Day.....

Good Glorious Morning Blog World!!!!!!

Merry Christmas to you and your's....

I was tempted to wallow in self pity this glorious morning because of the fact that I awoke to another christmas alone...but alas, God woke me early to spend some special time with Him as the sun rose. We walked a road this morning that is sometimes hard to walk...coming face to face with the truth's about my life. For one, I am alone. While I am thankful for the fact that He NEVER leaves me or forsakes me and that He DELIGHTS in me, it can be hard to be alone at such a time as this! But today I choose to rest in the knowledge that though I may be a bit lonely this Christmas, I am NOT ALONE! Praise God!

So, how did I spend my morning???

Well.....

I had chai with soy milk (my favorite warm drink) in this cute little Christmas pot....



Then I delighted my viewing senses with this favorite Christmas movie.....



I've also been working on making something special out of this.....


although my little project is with black yarn with a touch of grey for added dimension!

Later I might go by my aunts house for dinner.

It is a blessed day... I am grateful for God's most amazing, loving, unimaginable gift.....

JESUS!
Praying that you have a wonderfully blessed day celebrating with your loved ones!
From my house to yours....
Merry Christmas!!!!

Thursday, December 10, 2009

Reflections of the Season

I hope that you are having a fabulous December! I have discovered that this month is passing me by even as I frantically try to reign it in....I fear that I've somehow gotten caught up in the busyness of the season. Also, this has been a very busy season at work so my focus has really been directed there.

Part of me gets dissapointed that I've not been better at guiding my thoughts and heart toward the reason for this season; Jesus, but it is not over yet, so I can reclaim it. Hallelujah for that! My Lord has been teaching me so much over the past few months....it's all about freedom and taking courage. There are so many areas in my life that I am held captive by fear and I desire deeply to be freed of it.

This is my desire and as I find myself thinking ahead to the new year...my goal.

So, what have I been doing for the last few weeks?...Well, let me just share with you!

I was so blessed to attend Women of Faith at the Arco Arena in Sacramento last weekend. It was the second time that I've been able to go this year (which I know is a blessing indeed!). Both times were very special. Definately stones of rememberance in my walk with the Lord.
Here are some pictures of WOF last weekend. It was so so great :)
Julie, Melissa, and I during the pre-conference.

Marilyn Meberg...this gal is truly a gem! We all wanted her to be our personal therapist!

Incredibly gifted and talented WOF worship team..
It's a GRAND NEW DAY!

Patsy Clairmont...bless her heart, I did not think that she'd be at WOF due to her son's recent illness.
Beautiful reminder of the sacrifice of my Lord and the beauty of what it means for me.

I've also been a bit crafty!

I decided that I'd like to learn to knit and my sweet friend Robin taught me back in the spring. I took 6 months to complete this skinny scarf!
I guess I needed a lot of practice and really it was not my highest priority. Also, it was summer soon enough and I just could not think of wearing a scarf.

But.......

Now it is surely cold enough to wear one, so I've been a knitting nut! I made this scarf with the intention of gifting it to my sister in law, but loved it so much that i kept it for myself....selfish, I don't know....but I just decided that it was the first one that I made all by myself that I really liked! The skinny one was not my favorite :)


So, now I am working on a new one and have every intention to give it as a Christmas gift.

This is not the only craft that I've ventured into....I was browsing blogs one day and came across a post by Kelly at Kelly's Korner and loved, loved, loved the cute little ornaments that she made so I decided to make my own.....

My cute little creations....


So, what have you been doing this holiday season? Are you able to keep your focus? What special things are you doing to ensure that you keep your heart and mind on track?


I pray that the Lord bless you and keep you....I pray that he makes his face to shine upon you and be gracious unto you...and give you His peace!
Have a wonderfully blessed time as you anticipate the remembrance of the birth of our Savior!

Monday, November 23, 2009

Friend Making Monday: Thanksgiving

Just thought I'd participate in this...

1. Turkey or Ham? Turkey...yummy! My mom and dad always make it and it is best smothered in gravy with cranberry sauce.
2. Favorite side dish. My Tia Yaya's potato salad. Also love Kendra's asparagus wrapped in bacon.
3. Favorite dessert. My mini cheesecakes of course!!!!
4. Black Friday: Are you going or not? Yep...want to check out the deals with all the crazies out there!
5. If so, what's on the top of your list? Have not seen the ads yet but know that Kendra is going for the computer that is 298 at Walmart. I'd really like to try and find a deal on an SLR camera :)
6. Going out of town or staying close to home? Out of town...up to Cathey's Valley and Bear Valley to be exact.
7. Hosting or helping? Helping...no desire to ever host it.
8. Name one family tradition at Thanksgiving. My own little tradition is to have the Macy's Day Parade on the TV while I fix some awesome desserts! I run back and forth between the TV and the oven!
9. What do you do after dinner? We go for a walk behind my parents property. Usually have to walk with the cows, kids, and dogs. And dodge cousins who are more interested in being pranksters (cow pie throwing..yep)
10. What are you most thankful for this year? Most importantly, that I have a relationship with my Lord and Savior. Also my health, my family, friends, church, and job!

Saturday, November 21, 2009

My New Coat

Here is my new coat! It is very cute and I am so excited to have it :)

It was a steal of a deal...let me just tell you. The coat was 60% off the original price and then I was able to use a coupon for a 2 day sale and got an extra 15.00 off. So...this 200.00 coat cost me only 65.00!!

Can I just say now that I think 200.00 for a coat is WAY TOO MUCH!!!! I would never, never, never pay that much for a coat. It's note even 100% wool so I don't think that it is worth that much!

But 65.00?!....I'd say, "yes..thank you, I'll take it" :)



All righty...have a great day people...me and my coat are going to go and hope for cold weather soon so that I can wear it!

*What's the big deal with all this warm weather lately??? I don't think that I ever recall a end of November being warm enough to be out in short sleeves!

Saturday, November 7, 2009

34 Things That I Am Thankful For....

Today is my 34th birthday!

I can't believe that I am near my mid 30's. Where has the time gone?
I feel like it was just yesterday that I was celebrating the accomplishment of getting my license. Then it was the excitement of graduating high school and the start of college life.
College graduation came much later than I had planned for my life, but was in perfect time with God's blueprint. The start of my career came shortly after, followed by the addition of new family and nephews and a niece..and that is where I've been ever since.

There are some things that I thought I'd have as a part of my life by this birthday like a husband and children but that is not to be. I don't know why God's plan for my life has not included a husband and a child but I've come to understand that His plans are not my plans and His will is not always what my heart desires.

But no matter what, He is ALWAYS faithful and just. And He desires good for me.

This is a hard, hard, lesson.

I don't get it....I want to accept it, but that is a work in progress.

So today, on my 34th birthday, I choose to celebrate the wonderful things and ways that God has blessed my life and focus on His amazing work in me and through me.

To Him be all glory!!!!!

What I am thankful for in 34 little ways:
  1. My blessed life in Christ
  2. My family
  3. Cole, Evan, Isaac, and Kensley
  4. My incredible friends
  5. My awesome church (Big Valley Grace in Modesto :))
  6. My car that weekly gets me to my amazing church
  7. My health (especially in light of expose to H1N1 recently)
  8. My career
  9. My co-workers who've become friends
  10. My curly hair
  11. Products that actually work in my curly hair!
  12. My cats
  13. My home
  14. My love for all things sweet tasting :)
  15. My freedom
  16. My fuzzy robe
  17. My turbie twist
  18. My monkey slippers
  19. Netflix!
  20. My dentist (seriously...he is a blessing to me because I've been in need of so much work)
  21. My students
  22. My love of books and the resources to attain them....
  23. My comfy bed and down blanket
  24. My travel coffee mug...little things warm the heart in the coldness of winter.
  25. Chai tea latte at Starbucks
  26. Starbucks itself!
  27. God's protection over me
  28. My new budget (working on the thankful aspect here!...it will come in full soon!)
  29. True unconditional love
  30. Music that blesses my soul
  31. Words from the mouth of a child who was never expected to speak
  32. Resources enough to keep me fed, clothed, and sheltered each and every day
  33. The difficult things that enter the landscape of my life...because they lead me to the arms of my Savior.
  34. ANOTHER YEAR OF LIFE...MAY I LIVE IT ABUNDANTLY!

Sunday, October 4, 2009

The Parade of Coats....

Yeah! I am so glad that it is now October!
The fall weather is about to begin I just know....bye bye to the warmth of summer and hello to the coolness and crispness of fall.
I just love this season, first probably because it is the season of my birth (November) and secondly, because my favorite clothing is long pants/jeans, sweaters, scarves, and jackets....oh the jackets.
I must say that I have one too many jackets! Like some women have shoes...I have jackets!!!

My current selection of jackets:


My black leather jacket is similar to this one but a little shorter. I am not totally fond of it as the leather is not the really soft kind so it does not get a lot of use. I do like to use it for more formal dressing or if I have important events at school.

Sorry for the poor quality picture...it is all that I could find on the internet (should have just taken my own photo)...this is a tan rain coat that I bought years ago at Ross or TJ Maxx (can't remember which one!)....I love this coat! It is comfy and cute. Mine is a little darker in color...more brown than khaki.



My beloved Pea Coat!!!!! Mine is actually a charcoal color rather than solid black. I actually want a black one this season. What I especially love about this coat is that it is hooded. So in the coldest part of the winter as well as the windy days of spring I use the hood quite a bit. LOVE IT, LOVE IT, LOVE IT!!!!!
*Sad fact: my beloved pea coat has a little hole in the back of the jacket...just there from excessive use...I need a new one this year but how will I find the perfect one???!!!!


This jacket is very similar to my green one. The only difference is that instead of having the hooks across the jacket they are around the waist to the back. The jacket has 5 buttons down the front. Almost exactly like this one though! I like this jacket for casual dress days...like jeans and sweater days....

Gotta get ready for church now so I'll show you my Jacket Wish List in the next post.

Happy Sunday Bloggies!!!!

Friday, September 25, 2009

More Beautiful You....

Love this song...just had to share!

PS. Thank you ladies for the encouragement on my last post...you are such dears!

MORE BEAUTIFUL YOU
JOHNNY DIAZ

Little girl fourteen
flipping through a magazine
Says she wants to look that way
But her hair isn't straight her body isn't fake
And she's always felt overweight

Well little girl fourteen I wish that you could see
That beauty is within your heart
And you were made with such care your skin your body and your hair
Are perfect just the way they are

There could never be a more beautiful you
Don't buy the lies disguises and hoops they make you jump through
You were made to fill a purpose that only you could do
So there could never be a more beautiful you

Little girl twenty-one the things that you've already done
Anything to get ahead
And you say you've got a man but he's got another plan
Only wants what you will do instead

Well little girl twenty-one you never thought that this would come
You starve yourself to play the part
But I can promise you there's a man whose love is true
And he'll treat you like the jewel you are

So turn around you're not too far
To back away be who you are
To change your path go another way
It's not too late you can be saved
If you feel depressed with past regrets
The shameful nights hope to forget
Can disappear they can all be washed away
By the one who's strong can right your wrongs
Can rid your fears dry all your tears
And change the way you look at this big world
He will take your dark distorted view
And with His light He will show you truth
And again you'll see through the eyes of a little girl

Sunday, September 20, 2009

Me Today, God's Mercies Tomorrow....

I wish that I had some great idea for a new post but I just don't....this is mostly just a means to get my thoughts out.

Life has been a bit difficult lately. Family drama, relationships, and uncertainty about my future are taxing my strength, energy, patience, and joy. My emotions fluctuate between overdrive and turned off completley. Why is it that when life gets difficult, I either cleave to God more or run away from Him??? This season that I am in is marked by a running away from the Lord. Don't get me wrong...I've not lost my faith but I've just not turned to Him in complete surrender. I keep trying to run the other direction. In any direction that will give me some sense of purpose, comfort, relief, and meaning...but in the end it is those things that cause me disappoint over and over. Surrendering completely is so hard for me to do.

What exactly does total and complete surrender look like?

For me, at this stage in the game...it is dying to myself, giving up my agenda, my plans, my desires, and submitting to the mighty hand of God.

I have fears though...fear that God's hand in my life right now will hurt in some way...Fear that due to my sin, his hand will be a hand of discipline...Lord knows that I've missed the mark oh so many times and in so many ways....I just keep falling short....

But, our God is a God of second, third, and fourth chances and I'm not unreachable. Nor is he harsh or a tyrant...He is a loving God and He does desire to see me bloom in every way that He has made me to.
I need to reach out to Him....and trust his hand. Whether it be a hand of discipline or a hand of tenderness.

Lord, help me to submit to you.... I need you.....I can't do this like this much longer...I don't want to continually fall into the pit of doing my own thing Lord, I want to bring you glory and want to die to myself. I need you in a way that I've never before...come Lord Jesus and save me from myself! I submit to you today Father...to your hand in whatever fashion that you need to touch me with...I fear discipline but I choose tonight to trust you, even in discipline. Help me to understand how you love me through your discipline...remind me that your desire is not to bring me pain...you have no malicious intent, only love!

Thursday, September 10, 2009

Disturb me Lord

Disturb us, Lord, when
We are too well pleased with ourselves,
When our dreams have come true
Because we have dreamed too little,
When we arrived safely
Because we sailed too close to the shore.
Disturb us, Lord, when
With the abundance of things we possess
We have lost our thirst
For the waters of life;
Having fallen in love with life,
We have ceased to dream of eternity
And in our efforts to build a new earth,
We have allowed our vision
Of the new Heaven to dim.
Disturb us, Lord, to dare more boldly,
To venture on wider seas
Where storms will show your mastery;
Where losing sight of land,
We shall find the stars.
We ask You to push back
The horizons of our hopes;
And to push into the future
In strength, courage, hope, and love.

~Sir Francis Drake

Saturday, September 5, 2009

Undressing the Dragon: Lessons from Narnia

This passage from The Voyage of the Dawn Treader (Chronicles of Narnia) was used to teach at church Tuesday night. It hit me so hard and I've been contemplating it all week. Now that the weekend is here I have time to fully reflect on what I learned, document it for future reference, and share it with you all.
The back story leading up to this passage is that this boy, Eustace, is changed into a dragon and has a ring around his ankle that is hurting him terribly. He sees a pool of water and seeks relief there. So this is where the story picks up:

"So at last we came to the top of a mountain I'd never seen before and on the top of this mountain there was a garden-trees and fruit and everything. In the middle of it was a well. I knew it was a well because you could see the water bubbling up from the bottom of it: but it was a lot bigger than most wells-like a very big, round bath with marble steps going down into it. The water was as clear as anything and I thought if I could get in there and bathe it would ease the pain in my leg. But the lion told me I must undress first. Mind you, I don't know if he said any words out loud or not."
"I was just going to say that I couldn't undress because I hadn't any clothes on when I suddenly thought that dragons are snakey sort of things and snakes can cast their skins. Oh, of course, thought I, that is what the lion means. So I started scratching myself and the scales started coming off all over the place. And then I scratched a little deeper and, instead of just scales coming off here and there, my whole skin started peeling off beautifully, like it does after an illness, or as if I was a banana. In a minute or two I just stepped out of it. I could see it lying there beside me, looking rather nasty. It was a most lovely feeling. So I started to go down into the well for my bathe."
"But just as I was going to put my foot into the water I looked down and saw that it was all hard and rough and wrinkled and scaly just as it had been before. Oh, that's all right, said I, it only means that I had another smaller suit on underneath the first one, and I'll have to get out of it too. So I scratched and tore again and this underskin peeled off beautifully and out I stepped and left it lying beside the other one and went down to the well for my bathe."
"Well, exactly the same thing happened again. And I thought to myself, oh dear, however many skins have I got to take off? For I was longing to bathe my leg. So I scratched away for the third time and got off a third skin, just like the two others, and stepped out of it. But as soon as I looked at myself in the water I knew that it had been no good."
"Then the lion said-but I don't know if it spoke-You will have to let me undress you. I was afraid of his claws, I can tell you, but I was pretty nearly desperate now. So I just lay down flat on my back and let him do it. The very first tear he made was so deep that I thought it had gone right into my heart. And when he began pulling the skin off; it hurt worse than anything I've ever felt. The only thing that made me able to bear it was just the pleasure of feeling the stuff peel off. You know-if you've ever picked the scab of a sore place it hurts like billy-oh but it is such fun to see it coming away."
"I know exactly what you mean," said Edmund.
"Well, he peeled the beastly stuff right off-just as I thought I'd done it myself the other three times, only they hadn't hurt-and there it was lying on the grass: only ever so much thicker, and darker, and more knobbly looking than the others had been. And there was I as soft and smooth as a peeled switch and smaller than I had been. Then he caught hold of me-I didn't like that much for I was very tender underneath now that I'd no skin on-and threw me into the water. It smarted like anything but only for a moment. After that it became perfectly delicious and as soon as I started swimming and splashing I found that all the pain had gone from my arm. And then I saw why. I'd turned into a boy again. You'd think me simply phony if I told you how I felt about my own arms. I know they've no muscle and are pretty mouldy compared with Caspian's, but I was so glad to see them. After a bit the lion took me out and dressed me-"
"Dressed you. With his paws?"
"Well, I don't exactly remember that bit. But he did somehow or other: in new clothes-the same I've got on now, as a matter of fact. And then suddenly I was back here. "
(The Voyage of the Dawn Treader, C.S. Lewis. Pg 88-91)


I just love how in this passage Eustace learns that he must undress the ugliness of his top layers in order to feel true relief and freedom from the dragon in his life. But as we all know, our efforts and attempts to peel off the ugly only results in more ugliness found underneath. It is only when Eustace allows the lion (The Lion of Judah) to undress him completely and with a measure of pain that he is fully free from the ugliness of what is keeping him from being free of the dragon. I like how C.S. Lewis wrote that the only way Eustace could bear the pain of Aslan removing the skin was the pleasure of feeling the stuff peeled away. Praise you Father that there is pleasure when the layers of the onion, or in this case the skin of the dragon, are peeled away! Help me to endure the pain that accompanies the pulling away of the ugly and painful things! Bless me with the pleasure of it being gone once and for all!

Saturday, August 29, 2009

Dollar Deal!

Hi Ladies!

Hope that you are having a fabulous Saturday. I am enjoying playing around on the computer, updating the blog (do you like my new look??...fun!), checking emails, reading posts on facebook, and whatnot! I am supposed to be cleaning my house but luckily, it is not too bad this week. I tried to keep up on it during the week and must say that I did a pretty good job. The kitchen is cleaned, all clean clothes from last weeks laundry are on the bed in the guest room ready to be put away (that is the part that I despise the most...I'll wash and wash for days...I'll even iron first! I just really don't like putting the clothes away!!!!), and the carpets will soon get a vacuuming but other than that....it's all good!

So, I have to share this next little bit of information with you....it was quite fun!

Yesterday afternoon while shopping in Marshall's for a lingerie/bridal shower gift for Nicole I came across these pants..


Can you guess how much they cost me???!!!! You'll never believe me....they were only $1.00!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

How is that possible???? I personally think that they were marked wrong. They are cute...no holes...not a mark anywhere! And only a dollar! They are like 5 inches too long...but what else is new?!?!....I have a small pile of pants that I need to get into the seamstress that will be perfect for this fall/winter (if they fit still....aughhhh, I gained a bit of weight during my relaxing summer...think I relaxed a bit too much!). I was so excited....just had to share my joy with you!

Here is another picture of the pants....

I like the buttons down both sides. Reminds me of a pair of pants my grandma had in the 40's or 50's....Actually, I think that I have a picture of her in them :) Need to pull it out today and compare.


Just had to prove to you that they really were only a dollar! SEE!

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Snippets of Summer (warning: lots of pictures!)


This is what she does all day!!!!


Tiare's first dance recital! She is such a doll! It was so funny/sweet/cute to watch her get so confused but not worrying one iota about it!

Marissa giving a little love to Daisy...I want this dog!

My kitty Zoe...fur baby #1

My kitty Sadie...my fur baby #2

Lazy summer days involved a certain precious 3 year old, chalk, and little bare feet!

Ladies from BVG at Living Proof Live in Stockton.
My new friend, Jen. We met at LPL in Stockton...total God Story! Will share with you all later.

Summer night out with the girls...Jenny Lynn, Wendi, Julie, JoFawna, Melisa, Me, and Misty.
Pray for Wendi...she is fighting cancer right now...thank you sweet friends :)

One thing that I loved about this summer was my many photographing opportunities...this one was captured at Kathya's house during her pool party. It will go into my God's Delight Book for sure!...what is it with me, flowers, and little critters???

Summer party at Kathya's house....here I am with my friend/coworker/sister in christ, Lynn.

Coley bean all wrapped up in his lion towel....we made great progress this summer on his bathtub behavior! This kid freaks out when water is poured over his head so I turned it into a game giving him all control (so he thought!) and told him to put his "water hat" on...worked every time!

My first flower given to me by Cole....he squeezed my heart in a such a tender way...a way only a 3 year old little boy can! I love him so much!!! My heart swells from it.....

Robin and I at the San Francisco Walk for Aids....we were a part of the group that went from Big Valley....amazing experience that I will continue to participate in.

Waiting patiently to get out of San Francisco....might as well take a photo!!

Marissa showed her lamb (#63) at the Merced Fair....made me feel old because I spent year after year living at the fairgrounds each summer from the time I was 13 until I was 19....now it is her turn....precious piece of information....Marissa used my FFA jacket from 1990....still good as ever and has not changed in style!

This is how I spent my leisure summer mornings....in the Word with my Esther study! I like to study from multiple versions. I have a parallel bible but wanted these versions.

My concert buddy!!!! Miss Julie and I...one of these days, we'll need to count up how many concerts we've been to over the course of our friendship!

Long Black Train man....you know you can just hear that deep tenor voice!

Josh Turner at the Stan. Fair....he is sweet on the eyes...he's a happily married man though (I was sad to find out!).

Stanislaus County Fair....memories of high school...I refused to ride it though because you just cannot trust those carnies like you could in high school. That in addition to the idea of my body flipping numerous times through the air....just not appealing or enticing anymore!!! Settled for a picture of the favorite ride instead :)

Trip to Carmel....much needed quiet time...gorgeous....grateful for the sweet time with the Lord.

End of the summer bible study potluck...what should I make?? How about Hamantashen...yummy!

The completed work....what is supposed to be a triangular shape turned into flowers??!!

Sunday, August 23, 2009

What's On My Mind....

Hi friends...It has been a bit of while since my last post...much on my mind and some heavy burdens on my heart but God is faithful and true. I am soooo glad that I have Him to depend on because, as we all know, there is NOTHING nor ANYONE in this world that we can depend on like Him. I wanted to share this little excerpt that I wrote in an email to a good friend. It is reflective of what is on my mind these days and where I am in my walk with the Lord right now.
Also...I want to remember my words becasue, as we all know, there will come a day where I am lamenting my lot in life and whining and crying about some miniscule thing. I don't want to forget the wisdom and insight that God has blessed my with today...I need this in writing, in a place where I can easily read it again (as many of us agree...our blogs are much for our own benefit...a place to clear our minds, to document our lives, and to share our faith). I need to remember this.....

I am feeling God pull me toward full healing...also, I am tired of living under the yoke of my pain/shame/guilt/fears....so am finally taking Jesus's yoke upon me and discovering that it is easy and light. When I trade in his yoke for my own time and time again...I get burdened and heavy ladden so have to remind myself that I don't need to do that. That yoke is not meant for me to bear. It is meant for Him to bear....something Colleen said at the retreat and since in our sessions, is that God carried that yoke for me when he went to the cross. He carried the shame, the guilt, the fear, the burden itself...I do not need to live in bondage to my worst fear...He took care of it. I've accepted his gift of salvation for my sin...now I need to accept his gift of freedom for my mind and in my life.

Yes...Lord Jesus....I choose today to accept your gift of freedom and your offer of healing. Come Lord Jesus into my mind and not just my heart...pour out your healing waters over my mind. You know how I struggle with it. Forgive me Lord...heal me. I trust you...I believe, help me to overcome my unbelief!

What is God speaking into your life right now? What truths is He burning into your heart? Please do share...I love hearing how God speaks to his children!
The body of Christ is a beautiful thing....so glad to be a part of it!

Friday, August 7, 2009

You're Not Shaken

So, some of the blogs recently have had posts related to songs that inspire us, encourage us, or simply reflect where we are spiritually. I have not really been too into doing this as I love all music but have not had any one song that really stands out to me....UNTIL...this song.

Phil Stacey - You're Not Shaken
From the album Into The Light

I am sinking in a river that is raging
I am drowning, will I ever rise to breathe again
I want to know why I just want to understand
Will I ever know why
How could this be from Your hand

When every little thing that I have dreamed would be
Just slips away like water through my hand
And when it seems the walls of my belief are crashing down
Like they're all made of sand
I won't let go of You now, because I know You're not shaken

I'm trembling in the darkness of my own fear
All the questions with no answers still grip me while I'm here
And I may never know why I may not understand
But I will lift up my eyes And trust this is Your plan
When I am in the valley of the shadow of death
You're not shaken, You're not shaken
You're right here beside me
and You have never left
You're not shaken, You're not shaken

Label: Reunion Records

I am not going through anything that I would deem "the valley of the shadow of death" but definately am in the process of major life change (no...I'm not going through THE CHANGE!) and have been dealing with broken or unfulfilled dreams. The words that are like balm to my soul are these: "I won't let go of you now, because I know you're not shaken".

God is not shaken even when I am trembling in my boots. He is not shaken when I am unfaithful. He is not shaken when I am uncertain.

He is forever strong...forever faithful....forever and eternally there! Praise Him that he is not shaken even when I am.

I can trust this today! Lord you are not shaken....you are faithful....you are omnipotent....you are omnipresent....you are God of the universe!

Thank you for this reminder through song Lord....Help me to trust you today because you are not shaken!

Saturday, July 25, 2009

What I've Been Doing....

Well, well, well....It has been nearly two weeks since I last posted and I must say that I've got nothing people! Now that I can not post pics of my niece and nephew...blogging is just not as fun. I guess that I could still write about what fun things they do when they are here but I just cannot put the pics up :(....so sad....
So what have I been doing for the last 2 weeks? Pretty much NOTHING! I have diligently worked on my Esther study (summer bible study for Big Valley Grace) and have watched my niece K and nephew C a few times. I have to say that my little niece does not seem to enjoy being at Aunt Bethany's house....she just cries and cries and cries...so much so that today I had to call her parents to come and pick her up. I don't get it....she is so clingy. You who are parents, can you relate to this? K is 11 months old (on the 4th) and seems to be in a very clingy stage. I don't know if it has anything to do with the fact that my SIL had some trouble with post partum depression a few months back and was away from the kids for a week or so. Think that maybe that could have affected my niece in a detrimental way. Sad for me to think that no one is immune to pain in this life not even a 11 month old baby. But thank the good Lord that He is in control and that He knows all and works all things out for the good of those who love him. And my SIL does love him very much.
School starts back up in 3 weeks and I am so NOT ready! Where did the summer go??!! It was not this short when I was a kid! I hope that my students will quickly fall back into the swing of things and that this year will go more smoothly than the last. I am sad that I will be losing my right hand girl Nicole....she is getting married in October and will be moving to North Carolina so is definately consumed with all things wedding right now. It made no sense for her to come back to work for a few weeks only to take the month of September off anyway. So...your prayers for my group are welcomed! I know that I am starting with 9 kiddos for sure (they are preschool age autism). That is a rather high number to start the year off with and I know that I have at least 3 who are going to be very challenging. I want to get off to a good start though so am brainstorming ways to work all things out. How can I best serve the children and their families yet still maintain boundaries with my personal life. This was a big problem for me last year as I found myself giving WAY MORE than I should have to my job. I want to be balanced in my life and I know that when I give anything more time, effort, devotion, and commitment, than I give to the Lord, I will suffer. Don't want a repeat!
Let's see, what else have I been doing??....I attended the walk for AIDS in San Francisco last weekend. My church's missions ministry goes each year to minister and lend support to those impacted by this awful disease. It was an amazing experience! Wonderful fellowship with new friends from church and just amazing to see how many people are affected or feel need to be in support of such a cause! Of course, because we were in SF...I did get to see some, shall we call them,... characters??!!!!! I'll spare you the details but I bet you your wildest imaginations is what I saw!!! Only in San Francisco...and I love being a California girl so I would not trade it for the world! Total different ball game being a Christian in liberal California :) (beth moore even mentioned that at her event in San Jose a month ago!)
That's pretty much all that I've been up to lately! I have some pics that I will post soon but for now...gotta head to bed!
Nighty Night all!

Monday, July 13, 2009

Women of Faith 2009

Wow...2 women's events in a row! This past weekend I had the wonderful opportunity to attend the Women of Faith conference in San Jose, Ca. with some of the ladies from Big Valley. This was the 3rd WOF conference that I've been to and I loved it as always! I just love hearing the ladies share about their lives in absolute openness and from their heart. My favorite this year was Marilyn Meberg and Lisa Whelchel. Interestingly enough...I did not get a photo of either of these ladies!


Nicole C. Mullen with one of her guys doing her thing! This girl is so amazing with her talent in singing and dancing but her love for the Lord is just contagious! I've loved seeing her the last few times.


All the girls dancing with her. The one performance that I loved was The Hem of His Robe (think that is what the song is called!). She performed it with this group of girls and it just touched my soul. If you've ever seen her perfom it you know what I am talking about!


Anita Renfroe...the new Grandma! She was so excited to share that she became a grandma last week and showed pics of her new little guy! So very cute. I love Anita's humor and ability to bring many laughs to tired women!


Patsy Clairmont shared a story with us about her experience on her new red scooter, affectionally nicknamed Firefly (although it was definatly not small and cute but big and intimidating!). I love how Patsy shares stories...so much sweetness and silliness. It was extra special this year because she shared her heart pain of losing her sweet friend of 50 years, Carol, to cancer. My heart broke for Patsy's loss and I found the tears flowing freely.



Natalie Grant with her husband on the keyboard. I love Natalie's music so it was a great treat to hear her. She overflows with passion for the Lord and I can see why she is such a hit with the teen girls at the Revolve Tour. She had her little girls, Bella and Grace at the event. They are oh...so cute!


Our Women's Director, Connie Grover, her daughter in law Amber and Amber's mom (can't remember her name). I had a great time getting to know some of the ladies from Big Valley like Connie and Amber. I look forward to spending more time in fellowship with them!


Sonna, Me, and Gail. I had the great opportunity to room with Sonna and Colleen for the event and it was so much fun getting to talk with them and get to know them better. Gail is a sweet lady too. I was delighted to find out that she works in Special Education too! Intereresting how God places people in my circle who I can completely connect with!


My BVG sisters: Gail, Colleen, Sonna, Connie, and Me!
The weekend was marked by wonderful new memories and sweet fellowship!
Thank you Lord for how you bless me in sweet meaningful ways!